I am writing to touch on a subject that I have written about many times before. I have a hard time letting go of the past. I feel I create attachments with people, places, and of course a particular event in my life that will probably stay with me for the rest of my life. I got sick in April of 2009. I have never been able to let that go. It was a scary experience for me. I guess attachment is the wrong word. I need to let go of everything, all of it. I need to move on in my life.
I can’t focus on what happened way back when, I also feel like why do I bond with people in my life? It can be teachers, therapists, anybody in my life who works with me. Like for example those who work in the mental health field who’ve watched me recover, struggle, and come back from the brink. I will always question myself when it comes to this. I don’t know why a lot of the folks in my life have come to the conclusion that they should stay a part of my life.
I am feeling confused and with this I ask. Why? To each and everyone of you. Why did you decide to stay a part of my life? I know I asked this before. But I still don’t get it. I hope one day I don’t need to think about or even write about this subject. I want to be able to be happy that I create such bonds with people and that I have wonderful friends because most people my age can’t say that.
I can name off hand two past teachers I still keep in touch with, One of them I see on an every other month basis, or if her schedule allows for coffee. I should be blessed and not question myself right? But I haven’t really been able to do that in a long time. I hope that everyone who reads this understands where I’m coming from. That I just want to know why I am so lucky to have you all in my life?
Hi, Anna, No matter what the friendship, there are times when, for many reasons, we don't SEE the people we care about. Just because we done SEE these people every day, or even every month, it doesn't mean they can't be a part of our lives. I have friends from High School that I SEE....maybe once every year, but they are still there for me and although we all get tied up in our day to day responsibilities we know we can count on each other. Whether it be a quick email, coffee, or a whole afternoon, these relationships are what makes us who we are. I appreciate being a part of your life, however, small that part might be. I love knowing what you are doing and HOW you are doing. You can still live in the present while appreciating every aspect of the past. Hopefully, I will SEE you soon! Deb
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