Reaching out to adults and people my own age.

            Hi everyone be prepared for a post in which I vent a lot. I get extremely frustrated reaching out to people in my life especially adults. When I reach out to them I get a message and sometimes I feel like they are obligated to respond because if they don't then they feel bad. I hate feeling that way, simply because I know it's not true. But then when I don't get a response at all I get my feelings hurt. This blog entry is not directed towards anybody it is something I have been wanting to vent about for a long time. I like when people are direct with me no matter who it is. I just like knowing the truth. No matter how direct you are and no matter how hurtful it may be, I will get over it. I always do. I love it when I am able to keep in touch with the older generation, like my teachers, because to be honest they are trustworthy and non-judgmental. I have always had a hard time reaching out to people my own age but it's gradually getting better. And yes I know I am an adult now. Sometimes it's very hard to grasp though. I remember being a little innocent kid. Not a care in the world. I think the bullying that I had to endure is why it is so hard to reach out to people in my own age range.
       
      I am so blessed to have made some awesome friends over the years though. I may not see them often but I do feel lucky to know that they care enough to lend a listening ear when I need it. I hope I can still keep in touch with the teachers in my life. Yes I know they are very busy with the upcoming school year but I like telling them what's going on in my life. I know they love hearing from me. I don't necessarily care about getting a response knowing that they read it is good enough for me.  I am so lucky to have some totally awesome people in my life. I have learned a lot from both the younger generation and the older generation. I have attended several Young Adult events in the past and really enjoyed being a part of them. I was able to learn about myself and my ability to offer support to those who may need it. I know in a few years I won't be a young adult anymore and that scares me a lot.. I have to prepare to get older but you know what I think I can handle it.

        I have been pretty bummed lately because I made the decision not to go to LMC homecoming later this month. I have been struggling with depression and thought it would be better to take care of myself. I miss everyone there though. The faculty, staff, and my classmates. It was a difficult decision but it had to be done. I knew I would be going on my own too and I really didn't want to go alone. I did go to the reunion last fall by myself and that seemed to be a success. I conquered a fear which although scary was a blessing because I saw a lot of people I really care about. I feel so lucky to have a special place such as Landmark in my life. I hope everyone realizes just how special it is. That place taught me to slowly come out of my comfort zone. I did slowly but surely and I continue to do so even know being a member of the Point After Club. I will end this post for now. If I think of anything else I will come back here and post it. Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment.